For Every Purpose Under Heaven
by Lanindur Du'Undarian
Summary: James Potter arrives at Hogwarts for his final year a shadow of his former self. Lily remains oblivious to the tragedy that has befallen him over the summer, while his friends tirelessly fight to prevent him from going off the rails. AU. JPLE
1. Leaving The Summer Behind

-1**Disclaimer: **We do not own Harry Potter, it's themes, settings or characters. They all belong to JK Rowling, the creator of Harry Potter. We just borrowed them for this fan fiction.

**For Every Purpose Under Heaven**

**Chapter One: **Leaving the Summer Behind

The James Potter that arrived on platform nine and three quarters at 11am on the morning of September first was a very different James to the one who had left this platform three months prior. His distant, sunken eyes betrayed lack of sleep and his drawn, pale figure showed off his unwillingness to eat anything that might make him feel alive again. No family walked through the barrier after him and ushered him onto the train with farewell kisses and proud hugs. Not this year.

Walking as if in an empty dream the young man dragged his trunk up the steps of the Hogwarts Express and walked wearily down the corridor to an empty compartment in the far reaches of the train. The students he passed on his way watched him sympathetically, whispering to each other quietly, but he did not notice. Eyes directed firmly to the floor he avoided giving off any signs whatsoever that he wished to talk with anyone.

Heaving his trunk into the luggage rack James slumped down against the window in exhaustion. Out the window large families of wizards took it in turns to hug their departing children and siblings, wishing them luck for the coming year. Just in front of his compartment a proud father embraced his sixth year son in a tight hug, just as his own father had done the previous year. James felt his eyes begin to burn and blinked furiously, shifting his gaze from the scene with hollow yet bitter ache. Staring without seeing he once again became lost in a reoccurring thought that haunted him endlessly…

"_Why didn't he kill me too?"_

"James?" said a tentative yet familiar voice from the doorway.

He had not heard the compartment door roll back as one of his best friends, Remus Lupin, entered quietly. James looked up to see Remus hovering in the doorway, a troubled expression on his face. Despite everything that had happened, seeing his old friends face gave James a small jolt of relief and, for a brief moment, James could imagine being happy again. He smiled weakly at Remus, unable to reply. He had not spoken in many weeks now.

Remus, Understanding this completely, closed the door behind him and sat opposite James. He noticed the drawn appearance of his friend and his brow furrowed slightly. James too, noticed that Remus was also looking sickly, then realized that the full moon was approaching, so this was quite normal. Remus had of course sent many owls to James after the incident had occurred, as had Sirius. Of this James was increasingly thankful, despite the fact that he had not replied to either of them.

However it was at this moment that Remus fully appreciated that it was far easier to express his sympathy, and how he felt, to James through owls rather than to his face. Everything in his head seemed ten times weaker than what he truly wished to say, and he knew that if he said it, it would sound entirely unconvincing. James, sensing his friends internal struggle smiled bracingly and gave Remus a look of thanks, who in turn sighed with relief.

"I had to come and tell you.. well.. you'd probably forgotten and all.. with all that's been.. well its just.. your Head Boy this year James.. and .. well.. you have to sit in the compartment with the other head and the prefects." Remus finally managed to blurt out.

"Oh.." said James quietly. "I.. forgot"

"Its ok, its no big deal.. you probably won't have to stay there the whole time.. Sirius and Peter will sit in here and watch our stuff until we can get away."

"Right.." James said quietly. This wasn't exactly what he had wanted to hear. Sitting in a compartment full of prefects who would probably just stare at him for the entire trip was not something he was particularly looking forward too, especially when all he wanted was to be alone. He could be alone with Sirius and Remus; their presence was in a small way soothing to him. Anywhere else and he felt trapped. Trapped in the dark.

"Come on James, Let's go, they're waiting for us."

James concentrated on Remus' back as he followed him down the now moving train, refusing to look at the people around him who he could now hear whispering.

"Just ignore it James" Came Lupin's voice from in front of him. But even as the words reached his ears the small voice inside his head popped up.

"_They're wondering why you aren't dead too, you know."_

As the door rolled back James heard a voice shriek of joy as he stood hidden behind Lupin's back.

"Oh Remus! I knew it! I just knew you would be! Isn't it wonderful? Head of the school! My parents were so proud. Of course they said I'd be a shoe in but I didn't want to get my hopes up too high. But where's your badge? You didn't forget it did you?"

Lilly Evans voice rang in James' ears. A voice he had loved for a long time, even as she spoke it seemed for a brief shining second that a ray of light had penetrated the deepest darkness in his heart. But no sooner had it shone than it was swallowed up once more in the gloom.

"Oh.." said Lupin in an embarrassed, awkward sort of voice, "No Lilly.. its not me. I'm not Head Boy I mean.. I'm a prefect but- it's James, not me" he said quickly stepping aside so that James was brought into view.

Lilly looked between James and Remus, her eyebrows raised in a high arch.

"Very funny Remus, nice try but I'm not that stupid. Like Dumbledore would ever make Potter Head Boy."

"Um.. Well.. Actually he did" Said Lupin again, turning the slightest shade of pink. "See?" he pointed to James' badge pinned to the front of his robes.

Lilly's mouth fell open in shock. She seemed to struggle to comprehend what had just taken place. She stiffened up suddenly and shook her head.

"Well," She said sharply, "I didn't ever think Dumbledore would take part in favoritism. I had much higher expectations of him than that."

"Lilly that's not fair, James is a good student he got head boy on his own merits" said Remus starting to get angry.

"Ha! Good student? I guess he overlooked 'Arrogant student' and 'Bully' and 'Self Absorbed', 'Conceited'…" She recited spitefully on her fingers. "Ha! I guess being the Headmaster's grandson does have its advantages, aye Potter?"

"Cut it out Evans! Can't you lay off of him for five seconds! For Gods sake I thought maybe after everything that's happened you might cut him some slack.." snarled Remus to James' great surprise. He had never seen his friend so fired up before.

"After what happened?" She snapped back, slightly affronted at being yelled at.

Remus stared at her incredulously. "You can't tell me you haven't heard?"

"Haven't heard what?" she said started to get annoyed.

Lupin made to open his mouth when James cut him off.

"Drop it, Remus" he said clearing his throat loudly. He hadn't spoken aloud in so long his throat croaked horribly. Lilly glanced at him in surprise wondering what was wrong with his voice.

"But James.." Lupin began to interject.

"No.. Drop it.. If Lily thinks you deserve the Head Boy position more than I do she's entitled to believe that." He said croakily, looking directly at Lily whose eyes were still blazing.

"What do you mean if I think he deserves it more? He DOES deserve it more. All you've ever done at school is cause trouble. You've lost god knows how many house points for Gryffindor! Your obnoxious, you run around with that Sirius Black who thinks he's gods gift to women, you think your so cool because you're a chaser on the Quidditch team. Big deal! You set a poor example for younger students, I don't know what the hell Dumbledore was thinking when he made you head boy. You're hopeless! You're always up to something, always. "

Out of the corner of his eye James noticed that Remus had drawn his wand and was aiming it at Lily, shaking with fury. But before he could utter the silencing spells name James hit him with the disarming spell.

"Don't be thick, Remus." He said in a tired voice and slumped down in a seat by the window. "Its not worth it." Indicating that the conversation was over.

Remus scowled at Lily slightly, picking up his wand and shoving it in his pocket. Looking at James he frowned sheepishly then said "Sorry James, lost control.. getting near that time of the month.. you know"

James nodded thoughtfully as Lupin seated himself next to him and looked up just in time to see a look of outrage flick across Lily's face. Suddenly it dawned on him what Lupin had just said, and how, through misunderstanding, Lily could have taken this the wrong way. Her hand flew across the carriage before he could even lift his wand and hit Remus square in the jaw.

"Pig!" she yelled furiously, "How dare you!"

Remus sat for a few seconds rubbing his jaw in shock, trying to figure out what had just happened when the comprehension of what he had just said finally hit him.

"Ohh.. you thought I meant.."

**Whack!**

"Ouch! Cut it out would you.. I wasn't talking about you.. I wasn't making fun of you!" Lupin pleaded.

"Like hell you weren't!" Lily roared.

**Whack!**

"KNOCK IT OFF!" James boomed so loudly that several people jumped off their seats.

Lily froze, paled slightly then scowled at James. "Don't usurp authority over me you.."

"I said leave Remus alone" James said loudly. "Or I'll reconsider letting him jinx you."

"Oh? And what makes you think you have any Authority to allow him to do anything? Just because grandpa gave you a badge doesn't make you king of the world you know!" she yelled angrily.

James sighed and resumed looking out the window, clearing his throat again.

Lily turned and looked at James. She was slightly confused as to why he wasn't defending himself against her. She noticed he didn't look well and thought maybe he had a cold. She didn't, however, think this was a good enough excuse to lay off of him.

She glared at him and said "You don't deserve this. You don't deserve this at all. I don't know how you managed to talk Dumbledore into making you head boy, but I don't think its funny. I wont let you make a mockery of this position. You always have to have things your way don't you? You always have to get what you want even at the expense of your own friends. Of course your dear old grandfather would let you have whatever you want, wouldn't he?"

James saw out of the corner of his eye Remus gripping his wand tightly through his pocket. Seeing the determination in his eyes he quickly grabbed Mooney's wrist and gave him a stern glance. Remus bowed his head sadly in disappointment and relaxed his grip. James once again turned to face Lily, anger firing up inside of him again.

Lily knew she must have gone to far by the look in James' eyes when he turned to her.

"This is the last damn thing I want." He said trying to keep his tone even. Suddenly he felt his eyes burning again, and he turned sharply from her and gazed out the window, oblivious to the passing scenery, the little voice in his head saying;

"_She's right, you don't even deserve to be here"_

Lily huffed, sitting down between two Gryffindor girls from fifth and sixth year. Lily had noticed the emptiness in his voice and was just in the process of thinking over what could be wrong with him when she noticed the filthy looks she was receiving from the two girls either side of her. She raised her eyebrow skeptically.

"What's up with you too?" she asked sharply.

The girls snorted simultaneously, crossed their arms and turned their backs on her not saying a word.

"Fine." Lily said huffily. "Just fine."

Unfortunately for James and Remus, they were required to stay in the Prefects compartment for the entire journey, under the scathing looks of Ms Lily Evans. So when it finally came time for them to slip away, Sirius and Peter were already in their school robes and were in the middle of collecting their things together so that they would be ready to leave the train.

"James!" said Sirius as he entered the room and grasped his friend in a bear hug. "Its good to see you mate."

James smiled weakly, "You too."

Remus quickly launched into a heated re-enactment of the battle with Lily in the prefect's compartment. James pretended to busy himself with his trunk whilst Remus told the tale, pretending that it had not bothered him. It was obvious to everyone however, that it had upset him greatly. By the time Remus had finished his blow-by-blow account Sirius was red with fury.

"Evil little jumped up Wen.."

"Sirius. It's ok" James interjected.

Sirius stopped at looked at James. He looked exhausted, pale, and as though he hadn't had a good meal in several weeks. He realized that perhaps all this yelling was only making things worse, and decided to switch to cheering up mode. Sirius knew that James would let the events of the summer consume him unless he was given daily distraction. Luckily, Sirius and Remus were masters of distraction.

"I'm telling you mate, if I'd been there with you, you would have had a lot more than a silencing spell to deflect." Sirius said grinning.

James grimaced. "Really guys, it's ok. She's right, I would have been shocked to find out I beat Lupin to head boy too. I don't deserve it. I'm going straight to Dumbledore to make him give it to Remus."

"What? No! James I don't want it, it's rightfully yours.." Remus began.

"Yeah.. Well he was stupid to think I'd want this. I don't care about any of this.." he said in an empty voice, which caused Sirius and Remus to exchange significantly dark looks.

James rummaged through his trunk and began to pull on his robes when Sirius noticed something.

"Um, James, where are your Quidditch robes?"

"Didn't bring them." He said firmly.

"But why not? Your going to need them mate, big year.. your Quidditch captain!"

"I'm not playing."

"What!" came three simultaneous voices.

"I'm not playing Quidditch this year."

A stunned silence followed this exclamation and Sirius opened his mouth to argue but was stopped by a sharp dig in the ribs by Remus, who gave him a sharp look. Sirius scowled but shut his mouth, letting the conversation drop. It became apparent after several minutes of dead silence that James was perfectly serious about dropping Quidditch. His friends finally got to witness in person what the past summer had done to their best friend, he was a shadow of his former self. Sirius knew that things were beyond terrible the minute James informed them that he didn't care about Quidditch. Quidditch was ALL the former James cared about, except maybe Lily Evans, Merlin knows why. Sirius let out a defeated sigh.

"Come on James," Said Sirius reluctantly as the train pulled to a stop. " Lets get out of here".


	2. Where Do I Hide?

**Disclaimer: **We do not own Harry Potter or anything relating to JK Rowlings Books. What more can I say.

* * *

**For Every Purpose Under Heaven **

**Chapter Two: Where Do I Hide?**

The air outside was cool as James followed Remus and Sirius off the train. The noise of students piling off the train into the station filled James ears as he struggled through the crowd. Over the low rumble a clear voice rang through the air. "Head Boy and Head Girl over here please! Lily Evans and James Potter over here please!"

James recognized the voice immediately as that of his grandfathers, the headmaster of Hogwarts, Albus Dumbledore. Dumbledore was his mother's father, something that had always annoyed Lily to no ends, as she was always on the look out for any special treatment he may be receiving. Looking at her now he saw her usual cold glare that she reserved for him as she turned to wave at Dumbledore. Sighing, he headed towards the voice, bidding Sirius and Remus farewell. Up ahead he saw Lily Evans bounce up to Dumbledore, looking severely angry about something. As he approached he caught what was the tail end of their conversation.

"But why him? Remus deserved it so much more since he had worked so hard. James is bound to mess it up, he's a troublemaker he won't set the right example for the younger students." Lily said in a persuasive tone.

"Enough Ms Evans. My decision is final, whether you like it or not. Ah James, glad you could make it." Dumbledore said catching sight of his grandson.

"But he threatened to jinx me on the train!" she protested loudly.

"I said enough!" Dumbledore said sternly. "How are you James?"

James looked up at his grandfather and nodded soundlessly. Lily scowled at him and crossed her arms, shifting her gaze sternly back onto Dumbledore.

"Right then," He said cheerfully, "Now that we're all here, I want to talk to you both about your duties as heads of the school."

At this Lily snorted as though this was more for James benefit than her own. Dumbledore cleared his throat and gave Lily a dark look, and she shrank back giving her full attention to the headmaster.

"Right. As you well know, being head of the school is an enormous responsibility. You will be required to patrol the corridors after hours in rotating shifts with the teachers. You are to always try to set a good example for the younger students to follow at all times. You have charge over the prefects, who will report to you each evening regarding the events of the day. You have the power to deduct house points from misbehaving students, in limitation of course. A teacher can revoke any punishment that you hand out if it is thought to be too extreme."

At this Lily made a noise of disapproval, but was quickly silenced by the look in Dumbledore's eyes. James throughout this entire speech was struggling to pay attention. His mind kept wandering to a place where nothing could reach him.

"As you are now the two highest ranking students in the school, you have received some privileges. This year, you two will be working as a team to help run this school and make sure the students behaviour is at its highest standard. In order to act as a team I firmly believe it is essential to first learn to live as a team. Therefore, you will not be staying in your usual house dormitories this year. You will have your own shared dormitory, where you will both live for the remainder of the year, complete with its own common room and everything that you will require."

At the noises of protests coming from both the students suddenly Dumbledore chuckled, holding up a finger to silence them, and continued.

"Your friends will be able to visit you in your dormitory of course, though I would prefer that you spend as much time together as possible, to really get to know each other. This is the whole purpose of putting you together, after all." He said with a twinkle in his eye.

"You can't be serious!" Lily said furiously, "I have to live in the same dormitory as him all year?"

"I assure you Ms Evans I am quite serious."

"But Sir!"

"Don't worry Evans you won't have to put up with me much longer," James said wearily, "Sir, I wish to resign from the position of head boy."

"I'm afraid you can't do that James. Binding magical contract I'm afraid." said Dumbledore cheerfully.

"What? I never signed any contract!" he said in disbelief.

Dumbledore glanced around shiftily then cleared his throat and quickly said "Anyway, if your ready follow me, I'll show you to your quarters. Ms Evans, this way please."

Scowling, the pair followed him up to the castle and off towards their dormitory, which, as it happens, was located on the seventh floor behind a statue of a frumpy looking witch.

"Gillyweed" Professor Dumbledore announced cheerfully.

"Excuse me?" Lily asked.

"The password dear girl, the password." He said smiling.

"Oh!" she said as the statue swung to the left to reveal a narrow corridor leading towards the head student's common room.

"Mind your heads." Dumbledore said as he swept inside the tunnel and lead them forth into a cozy room much like that of the Gryffindor common room.

A grand fireplace was roaring in the centre of the room, and hundreds of floating candles hovered over their heads, brightly lighting up the shadows. Several soft, squishy armchairs lay scattered around the room. The great tall windows were covered in heavy dark red drapes. Several red and gold throw rugs lay on the floor. James couldn't help but notice the décor was obviously designed around their house colours. Two spiralling staircases lead off from the main room, one swinging right, and the other left.

"Lily, your room is up the right hand staircase. James, yours is up the Left. Bathrooms are joined to your rooms. Your belongings have already been brought up by the house elves." Dumbledoretold thempolitely.

"Sir," James began, "You can't be serious about this..."

"As I have already informed Ms Evans, I am perfectly serious. There will be no arguments. You will learn to live together. Do I make myself clear?" he asked in a firm voice.

"Perfect." He said without waiting for their answers. "Now if you'll kindly escort me down to the feast. I think we shall be just in time for the sorting ceremony."

* * *

The mood in the great hall was boisterous and cheerful. That is, until James walked in. The noise dropped to silence and James' footsteps echoed through the great room as he made his way to the Gryffindor table. Sirius clapped him on the back and gave him a bracing stare as he sat down at the very end of the long bench. They looked at him inquiringly, obviously wondering where he had been and what Dumbledore had said. 

James quickly launched into the story of how he was expected to live with Evans for the whole year in their personal dormitory, and began ranting about the injustice of it all when Sirius started grinning stupidly.

"What?" asked James in curiosity.

"Oh, nothing..." he said smirking.

"What?" James said again more forcefully, suddenly aware of the fact that Lupin was now smirking too.

"Just you know... You and Evans... alone... in a dormitory..." Sirius said trying to keep his voice casual.

"And your point is?" James asked.

Sirius grinned at Remus then launched into the best girl impersonation he could muster. "_Oh James... It's so lonely in this big empty dormitory... Whatever shall we do? I'm scared of the dark... I don't like being in my room all alone... I'm so weak and defenseless... can I sleep in your room?_"

"Sirius..." James said in a bored voice.

"Yes James?" Sirius attempted to stifle his grin.

"Don't be a twat."

"Yes James."

Across the table James suddenly noticed that Lily had turned a nasty shade of red, and he thought that if it had been possible, steam would have been issuing from her ears.

"I think she heard you..." James whispered to Sirius.

Sirius looked up at Lily and laughed, "I think she did too" and gave her a bashful wave.

"Grow up!" she yelled as she threw her pumpkin juice at Sirius, who ducked out of the way just in time.

"Easy Evans... All I was saying is its going to be pretty hard to resist James charms while you're living together." He said grinning.

"Whatever." she snorted and returned to her friend's conversation.

As Sirius stopped laughing, all the whispers from the surrounding tables suddenly met James ears once more. His face went slack and he dropped his head looking at his shoes. Sirius looked alarmed until the whispers too caught his ears.

Sirius raised an eyebrow at James and his shining eyes clearly said;

"_Just point me in the direction of the one you want me to take out first! The night is young and you know how much I enjoy clobbering people."_

James grinned half-heartedly. He was grateful of his friend's attempts to try and cheer him up, but he still felt guilty every time he smiled. Looking up at the staff table James saw Dumbledore watching him carefully. Catching his eye James quickly looked away, and when he chanced a glance back, Dumbledore had risen from his seat, commanding the silence of the entire school. They had been too busy discussing James living arrangements for the next year to pay attention to the sorting ceremony, of which he remembered nothing. He glanced to his side to see both Sirius and Remus looking at him in concern. He sighed and turned his attention back to Dumbledore.

"To our new students, welcome, welcome to Hogwarts. To our returning students, welcome back." He said, his eyes twinkling behind his half moon spectacles. "I have some announcements to make and some beginning of term notices, but before I announce these..." he said, pausing for dramatic effect, "Dig in."

It took a few moments for the students to work out that the feast had just appeared on the tables before them, but once they had, the hall was filled with the bustling sounds of cutlery, laughter and shouted conversation.

Sirius turned to James and grinned. "Well, you heard the man, let's eat."

"You go ahead, I'm not hungry."

"Ah..." he said, throwing Lupin a significant look. "Me and Mooney here thought you might say that. That's why we got you..." he paused, turning around and removing something from the seat between Remus and himself, "Dun Dun Dun... Treacle Tart!" He shouted as he spun around grinning stupidly, the perfectly decorated tart on a plate in his hands.

"No thanks guys".

"What? You? Say no to treacle tart? What is the world coming too? Lupin you better check his temperature... Something must be wrong with him..." Sirius said jovially before he could stop himself.

"Oh? You think?" James said in a dark voice.

"Sorry mate I-"

"-Wasn't thinking... You were just trying to cheer me up I know I know. Listen guys I'm going to bed." He said quietly, trying to keep his voice as normal as possible.

He felt worse than it was even possible as he walked away from the table and out of the hall, heading up the stairs to Gryffindor tower. He didn't want to be angry at Sirius, he knew he was only trying to help, but everything that had happened over the summer was still too close to his heart for him to be laughing and joking with his friends again. He wished he didn't feel so miserable, but failed to see how he could make those feelings disappear.

"Going somewhere?" came a voice from behind him as he climbed up the stairs to the seventh floor.

He turned to see professor Dumbledore leaning casually against the banister of the stairs. The diversion prevented James from leaving the staircase in time before it began to shift to another location, as these stairs frequently did. James cursed under his breath.

"To bed, Professor. I'm not hungry." James said quietly.

"Yes, so young master Black informed me. When was the last time you ate, James?" Dumbledore said softly.

James had to think about this. The truth was he had no idea. No perception of time that had passed since the incident, no perception of what was going on around him.

"I'm not sure, Sir," he mumbled.

"I thought as much. We need to talk James."

"No we don't, Sir." James said stiffly, he would not be forced to talk.

Dumbledore observed the boy carefully. "I cared for them too, you know." he said quietly.

James looked at the steps below him, his eyes suddenly blurry. "I know..." he whispered. "But you didn't have to see.."

Dumbledore looked suddenly pained and he moved up the stairs a few more spaces.

"Are you sleeping well James?" he asked tentatively.

"No, Sir."

"Nightmares?"

"And worse. I guess you could call them that. Except they never leave me. Not even when I wake."

Something splashed onto the step below James softly.

Dumbledore frowned and pulled a small bottle out of his robes, handing it to the boy before him. "Dreamless sleep potion" he said to the enquiring look. "It will help you get some rest. I know it cannot fix anything, but at least you will sleep."

James looked up at Dumbledore and was surprised to see a tear rolling down his face.

"Sir, I can't do this." He said, handing Dumbledore his Head Boy badge. "I don't want it, it should belong to Remus."

"Is that your opinion, or Ms Evans?" Dumbledore asked shrewdly.

James looked up in surprise. "I believe it is an opinion we both share. You made a mistake when you gave me this."

"It is unfortunate then, that it cannot be undone, is it not?" the old man said, his eyes holding a mischievous twinkle.

James was starting to get angry. "Don't play games with me old man! I don't want to be head boy! I can't do it! I can't!"

"You can and you will. You just need some time, no one expects great things of you right now James." said Dumbledore firmly.

"I'm resigning as Quidditch captain. I'm not playing this year." James said dropping his volume again.

"I kindly refuse your resignation." Dumbledore said cheerfully.

"You can't do that!" said James in frustration.

"Oh, I think you'll find I can" he said happily, the twinkle in his eyes becoming increasingly more annoying to the young man standing opposite him.

"Did you just come up here to piss me off or what?" Shouted James, his eyes blurred with angry tears.

Dumbledore shrugged. "Yes I suppose I did really."

James looked at the old man incredulously. "What?" he said in confusion.

"At least you're talking now. You've been through much James, and you've shut yourself down. You need to let these emotions out; it's the only way you can begin to heal. You're playing right into his hands, James. Don't you see that if you keep on going the way you are you'll destroy yourself. You're my grandson, and I'm worried about you." Dumbledore said with a deep concern in his voice.

"Don't you tell me what I'm doing? Where have you been for the last two weeks? While I've been going through hell? You don't understand, you'll never understand! You obviously don't give a damn about me so just back off! I'm doing just fine without your advice and without your stupid potions!" he said angrily as he slammed the small bottle of dreamless sleep potion into the steps at his feet, watching it burst into a thousand shattered pieces.

He spun around on his heel and tore up the final stairs and off towards the common room. He ran blindly all the way up to his dormitory and threw himself down on his bed and swore as loudly as he could manage through the muffling of his pillow.

He was alerted suddenly by a small wheezing cough behind him. It was then he realized he had come to the wrong common room out of habit. Swearing loudly, he spun around sharply to see Peter sitting on his own bed unpacking his things. He jumped in alarm at the look on James' face as though he had been burned and whimpered slightly.

"S- s- sorry James... I – I was just unpacking... didn't much feel like... sitting at the feast... you know..." he stuttered, fear still in his eyes.

"It's ok Wormtail..." said James sitting up quickly and yanking something that shimmered brightly out of his back pocket. "I need your help anyway... I can't breathe in this place..."

Judging by Peter's expression, the tone of James voice was still somewhat alarming to him, it was empty sounding, almost soulless.

"A-anything James... Anything at all..."

"Good. Now hurry, I appreciate this Peter, I really do." He threw his invisibility cloak over both of them and they crept slowly into the common room and out of the portrait hole.

* * *

Sirius and Remus headed towards James and Lily's dormitory nearly two hours later and gave the password James had told them earlier. As they headed down the narrow tunnel towards the head students common room Remus shoved Sirius in front of him. 

"_Remus"_ Remus said in a mocking voice "_You better check his temperature, there must be something wrong with him..."_ There was a resounding crack as Remus whacked Sirius over the head. "Honestly! Could you have picked anything worse to say?"

"Ow! Well sorry! I was just trying to help damnit. James knows full well by now that I'm an ignorant, dim-witted bastard! He probably expected it!" Sirius yelled.

Remus smirked perhaps a little too obviously, which landed him a whack upside the head.

"Ouch! What? You said it not me!"

"Well you're not supposed to smirk in agreement!" thundered Sirius.

"I didn't smirk in agreement! I smirked because I just realized something!"

"Oh yeah? What's that then?" he asked in a warning tone.

"That you must be fairly In touch with your inner eye if you know you're an ignorant dim-witted bastard." Remus said with a grin, and slipped out of Sirius' arms reach and into the brightly lit room before he could lay hands on him.

The sudden entrance made Lily jump, then scowl in disgust as she realized who had entered.

"What do you want?" she barked.

"Calm down Evans, we came to see James." Sirius said in a bored voice.

"He's not here, I thought he was with you." she said in surprise.

"Maybe he's hiding from you upstairs, you're not exactly captain supportive today are you?" Remus snickered.

"He's not, I checked." Lily replied shortly.

Sirius snorted. "Can't leave the poor guy alone for five minutes can you?"

"Ho hum" Lily said in a bored voice, "I asked the statue, James hasn't been back here since we left with Dumbledore. Maybe he's in your common room. You know, the one that belongs to all those people who aren't important enough to be head students?" Instead of the outrage Lily had expected to find she was instead met with looks of great concern.

"Where would he go?" Both Sirius and Remus chimed at each other at the same time in panicked voices.

"I don't know!" they replied to each other.

"Where's the map!" They barked to each other, and then suddenly tore from the room before Lily could even ask what the hell they were talking about.

"I just knew it, screwed up already and we've only been here four hours. Typical." She muttered.

* * *

"Where is James, Peter?" said Sirius, towering over him threateningly. 

"I- I don't know wh- what you're talking about!"

They had entered there own dormitory to discover a nervous and slightly suspicious looking Wormtail cowering at the sight of them. The look in his fearful eyes told them plainly that he knew exactly where James had gone.

"DON'T make me do this Peter!" Sirius yelled pulling out his wand.

Peter shrieked again and ran behind Remus, cowering like a dog. Remus spun around and grabbed him by the arms, holding him still so that Sirius could get a good shot in. "Wait!" Peter yelled in panic, "He went to Hogsmeade! Under the invisibility cloak! He made me transform and freeze the Whomping Willow for him!"

"Hogsmeade?" said Remus as he dropped a shaking Peter to the floor. "But why would he go there?"

Peter whimpered and crawled back to his bed.

"ANSWER HIM!" Sirius thundered.

"I-I don't know! He wouldn't say! He told me not to tell anyone where he had gone!" Peter said trembling.

"Shit..." said Sirius loudly. "Remus this doesn't sound good. I'm going to look for him."

"Sirius..." Lupin began.

"No, I have too. Anything could have happened to him, you saw what he was like at the feast!"

"I know, I know. I'm coming too."

Sirius noticed Peter was starting to edge towards the door slowly.

"Oh no I don't think so Peter... I need you to freeze the stump. You can do whatever you like after that." Sirius said, grabbing him by the collar of his robes.

Peter whimpered quietly but nodded all the same.

"Ok Remus, bring me the map." Sirius said quickly.

Remus snatched something out of the bottom of his trunk and smoothed it out between them on the bed. "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good." he said as he tapped the parchment with his wand.

"Ok" said Sirius scanning it quickly. "Filch is in his office. Dumbledore is in his office. The coast is clear... except... wait, Shit. Evans is patrolling the entrance hall. She must know we're up to something."

Remus clucked his tongue impatiently. "Well of course she does, we pretty much just revealed that James has flown the coop, and it is after hours. She'll be waiting for us. She'll do anything to nab James for something and lose him his Head Boy badge."

"Shit." Sirius said under his breath. "We should have been more discreet, I'm just so worried about what he'll do, I mean, you saw him today. He's a mess."

"I know Sirius," Remus said bracingly, "But it's ok, I'll distract her, you and Peter sneak past us, I've got an idea that should keep her full attention. Just make sure you find him ok?"

"Don't sweat it Mooney, I'll find him" Sirius said quietly. "Right, Peter, you should transform now, so I don't have to listen to your incessant whimpering all the way downstairs."

"Yes Sirius." Peter said as though obeying an order, and vanished from the bed, leaving behind a small sickly looking rat. Sirius scooped him up and put him in his pocket. "You chew on my wand, and I'll chew off your tail." He spoke threateningly into the pocket.

Remus snickered. "Ok let's go"

Their path was not hindered by any person as they headed toward the entrance hall. Sirius guessed that this was because everyone was so exhausted from the train ride and bursting at the seams from the feast to be doing anything but sleeping. But right on queue, as they reached the entrance hall, they spotted Lily Evans checking a room leading off the entrance hall for rule breakers. Sirius clung to the shadows as he stole along the wall towards the great double doors. Remus however walked right up the middle of the hall in plain view and shouted out to Lily. "What?" she said in a sharp voice, "Come to save Potter's ass have you? You shouldn't be here you'll get in trouble."

"Lily, Lily, Lily," Lupin said quietly, "I am a prefect you know. I'm not going to be in trouble for patrolling. And as a matter of fact I just came to apologize."

"Oh? For what?" said Lily, still slightly affronted at his behaviour.

"For yelling at you and trying to jinx you on the train." Remus said as sincerely as he could manage, for behind her, Sirius was creeping through the shadows like a ninja. "I'm sorry; it's just that, James has been through a lot of shit the past few months. I just don't want anything to set him off, you know, push him over the deep end. He's really... Well, he's not himself right now."

Lily puffed herself up and snorted. "That's no excuse to be running around after hours. And don't give me that 'He's patrolling' bullshit, I've already checked and I know he's not. Don't get yourself into trouble over him Remus; just tell me where he is. Dumbledore will have his head for this"

"I gathered that that was all you wanted to know for." said Remus angrily. "Just forget about where James is, leave him alone for five seconds why don't you?"

"No! It's not right and I won't accept it!" She said defiantly.

"Well, you're on your own then." Remus said firmly. "I just wanted to apologize for loosing my temper that's all. I won't help you ruin James chance at head boy."

Lily sighed and looked at Remus. "I understand. You're loyal; I'll say that about you."

"Thank you". Remus said quietly, and, noticing that the Entrance hall door had just clicked closed, he added, "Though I'll never understand why you're such a bitch to James all the time, I'll say that about you."

Before he turned to leave her, he saw the fire burning in her eyes as she glared at him. Remus smirked, and allowed himself a little self appreciation. She hadn't even heard Sirius trip slightly as he went out of the door. Remus decided that harassing Lily was actually quite fun, and made a mental note to himself to do so more often. He grinned to himself, _'mission accomplished'_. Whistling quietly to himself, he headed back up to the common room to await Sirius' return, and, hopefully, James'. Behind him, Lily Evans stomped furiously across the hall to check another adjoining room for someone to apprehend. Remus could just see Sirius' face as he stole away across the school grounds, proud to be one up on Lily Evans, and only a few hours into the school year.


	3. The Irrepressible Ache

**Disclaimer:** We do not own Harry Potter, It's characters, themes or settings. All belongs to JK Rowling, except the original ideas pertained in this fanfiction.

* * *

**For Every Purpose Under Heaven**

**Chapter Three: **The Irrepressible Ache

The great shaggy black dog bounded into the shrieking shack and barked once, swinging his head from side to side. He sniffed the floor curiously and picked up the scent he was looking for. As he suspected, it lead to the high window, and only escape route from the shack. The dog transformed suddenly and Sirius shook out his hair, swearing quietly and gazing up at the window. With an almighty leap he grasped the windowsill with his bare hands and heaved himself up and halfway through the window.

"Geez James you really were keen to escape weren't you?" he muttered under his breath as he swung his leg out the window and looked down. There was quite a drop to the ground below.

Sirius sighed. "The things I do for your love, James Potter."

He closed his eyes and jumped rather awkwardly from the window. Landing unharmed he quickly picked himself up, transformed once more, and stole away down towards the village of Hogsmeade. Under the cover of darkness it was almost impossible for anyone to see the great black dog bounding along the street of the village, since he clung to the shadows in any case, peering through the windows of the establishments that were still open at this time of night, looking for any trace of James.

He couldn't help but notice that Hogsmeade by night was a lot seedier than the Hogsmeade he knew during the daytime. It had a strange vibe to it; it was strange to him to think that this wonderful place could also harbor dangers at night time. These were not safe times, after all.

Finally, as Padfoot crept passed the Hogs Head Inn, he saw James swaying from a barstool, with what looked like a shot of Fire whiskey clutched in his hand. Heading around the corner of the Inn, Sirius transformed once more, ran his hand through his hair and walked back around to the entrance and pushed open the door. The drunken ruckus that met his ears deafened him for a brief moment and he staggered backwards. Righting himself, he pushed onward towards the bar and clapped a hand down on James shoulder.

"The next time you want to go pissing up in Hogsmeade, why don't you invite me too? Looks like I missed out on all the fun." He said grinning, as he looked around the bar at the bunch of seedy drunks who were all eyeing him suspiciously. Clearly anyone who wasn't already drunk was not welcome in this bar.

"Sirius!" James said loudly. "Glad you could make it. Can I get a Fire Whiskey for this gentleman please!" he shouted to the barman who smelled suspiciously of goats.

"That wont be necessary my good man." Sirius said nodding to the barman. "We've got to go mate, Remus is waiting for us."

"Remus? Where's Remus? Why didn't he come too?" James said slurring his words slightly.

"He had to hold off your girlfriend while I broke out of school to come and find your ass, didn't he?" Sirius said, smirking slightly. "Good thing we have your invisibility cloak. Sneaking back will be much easier."

"Lilly was there?"

"Of course she was there mate. She was patrolling the entrance hall."

"Oh, right, of course. Shame Remus couldn't make it; I think he would like this place."

Sirius snorted as he looked around again at the dirty unshaven men inhabiting this bar, one of whom was now crawling around under the barstools looking for his wand, another who was picking his underwear out of his ass.

"I'm sure he would mate. Come on" he said with an uncontrollable grin as he put an arm around James to help him stand.

"Sirius... I don't feel so good..."

"I know mate... Fire Whiskey tends to do that..."

"I think I'm gonna be si..." but before James could get the rest of the sentence out he vomited all over the floor of the Inn.

"Nice projection mate! I'd say that was an 8.5 out of 10, a little more work and you'll be unbeatable!" said Sirius with a look of awe.

"GET OUT!" yelled the barman as he advanced on them with his wand. "Throw up on my floor will you? Little mongrels! Don't ever let me catch you back here again or there'll be hell to pay!"

Laughing, Sirius staggered as fast as he could with James out of the Inn and half dragged, half carried him down the street.

"Well now, that'll be a story to tell the grandkids about." Sirius said as James started up a chorus of the school song.

"Ugh, James, remind me to get you some singing lessons ok?"

All that emitted from James was a series of low incoherent mumbles.

"James, stay with me buddy. I know I am all that is man but I really don't want to have to carry you all the way to the castle ok?" Sirius said struggling under James' weight. He gave him a sharp dig in the ribs, causing James to yell.

Sirius sniggered in amazement. "Some first night we're having this year aye, James? Remind me why we didn't get blindingly drunk every other year on our first night back?"

"Because my family wasn't murdered in front of my eyes every other year right before I got back here." James said with a hollow laugh.

Sirius faltered and looked across into James' eyes. "I'm sorry James. I'm truly sorry."

"I know you are. I'm sorry for acting like a prat. I just don't know how to deal with this shit." he said, his voice choking slightly.

Sirius could see tears rolling down his face in the moonlight. "Its ok mate, you'll get through this, me and Remus, we'll help you get through this. You can come stay with me; I've got my own place now and all. I owe you for all the times I crashed at your place."

"Thanks Sirius. The house is just so empty. I don't know if I can go back there yet."

"I understand. Did Dumbledore find you? He chased you out of the Great Hall."

James snorted. "Yeah he found me alright. Refused to let me give up Head Boy. Refused to let me quit the Quidditch team. Selfish bastard. Doesn't give a damn what I want does he?"

Sirius shrugged. "He's senile. We have to make allowances for senile people. And everybody knows Dumbledore's a crazy old fart."

James laughed his first real laugh since his parents had been murdered. Then as his laughter died away, he turned to Sirius and said in a wavering voice, "I'm glad I still have you Sirius."

"I love you too sweet cheeks," said Sirius grinning. "Though I'd love you a whole lot more if you'd support your own weight."

* * *

Getting back into the shrieking shack caused Sirius severe problems, seeing as James could barely stand longer than 10 seconds on his own. He ended up boosting James up through the open window, who came straight down on the other side with a resounding thud. 

"Ohh, your gonna feel that tomorrow James!" he shouted in amusement through the wall.

The only reply he received sounded remarkably similar to a muffled, "I'm going to kill you."

Once Sirius had managed to scrabble back up into the window and drop down inside the shack, he met James who was rubbing a lump on the back of his head profusely.

"Sorry about that buddy, couldn't be helped, you know..." smirked Sirius.

"Yeah yeah..." muttered James under his breath.

The journey back through the tunnel was uneventful beside Sirius smacking his head into the ceiling several times whilst trying to balance James beside him. When at last they had reached the Whomping willow Sirius transformed back into the shaggy black dog and made sure James was holding on tightly. He burst forth from the opening at the base of the tree at the speed of light, not giving it a change to pummel them to death.

Once he had bounded at least several yards out of the trees violent grasp, Sirius let James slide to the ground, then transformed back, shaking out his hair. Pulling James' Invisibility cloak out from his back pocket, Sirius attempted as best as he could to cover them both, and once more aided a staggering James across the school grounds and up towards the castle. Grass stained after tripping several times, Sirius breathed a sigh of relief when they finally hit the stone steps that lead up to the great entrance doors.

Peering through the crack in the doors Sirius saw that Lilly was no longer anywhere in sight, and figured she must have given up and returned to her dormitory.

"Come on buddy, time to move" Sirius whispered as the great doors creaked open.

An invisible Sirius half dragged half carried the invisible drunken James back up to the seventh floor where Remus was waiting for them by the witch statue.

"Bout time! What took you so long?" he breathed quietly as Sirius threw off the cloak.

"Oh, I'm sorry, perhaps you would have coped better dragging his drunken ass back to school." Sirius said dripping with false sincerity.

"He's drunk?" Remus said with a suppressed grin.

"Completely annihilated. Threw up all over the Hogs Head on our way out. The barman is not a happy chappy." Sirius said smirking at the memory.

Remus grinned. "Come on James," he said, wrapping his arm around James other side, "Let's get you to bed".

Guiding the staggering, still singing James down the narrow corridor was no easy feat, and as they entered the common room an exclamation of victory erupted from one of the armchairs. Lilly sat watching them, her arms crossed, a triumphant gloating look on her face.

"Bit late, isn't it James?" she said in triumph. "Don't think any of the teachers will approve of this."

"Shut up Evans" Sirius said in disgust, struggling to keep James upright.

"What's the matter with him?" She asked, noticing his lack of ability to stand, "Wait... is he..? Drunk? Oh my God he is! What the hell are you playing at Potter? I knew you were a complete waste of space but this? Drinking problems huh? I suppose you get that from your father as well."

"Pipe down Evans!" Remus yelled.

"And after everything Dumbledore has done for you, getting you the position of head boy. Probably thought mum and dad would be so happy, that they'd get to gloat to all their friends, that their precious son is head boy! All the attention you would have got! Dotting on you like a spoilt little 2 year old! Now they'll be ashamed! They'll have to cover it up so that they don't have to explain why their son is an alcoholic!"

"I never wanted this job!" James said in a wavering voice.

"Whatever," she said stubbornly, "Mommy and Daddy will be so proud of little James, Head Boy, what an accomplishment. You can't tell me that they had nothing to do with Dumbledore's final decision! You're a spoilt brat! If mommy and daddy can't get you something good old grandpa will! Or they'll manipulate him into getting it for you! Your parents are just as bad as you are! Lie, cheat and manipulate and oh I'm sorry, DRINK your way to the top, that's..."

Lilly froze mid sentence. James had leapt up from his deflated position so suddenly and violently that Remus and Sirius were thrown off of him and had to leap back on him to hold him back. His wand was sitting right in the nape of Lilly's neck, his chest was heaving furiously and his eyes burned dangerously.

"One more word Evans and I swear to god!" he screamed, heart pounding.

Lilly gulped, not daring to move as Lupin attempted to drag James away from her.

"Just shut your mouth! Just shut it!" He yelled. "You don't know anything about my parents! Nothing! You don't know anything about my family! Don't you dare insult them ever again or I swear to god I'll kill you! I'll kill you!" he burst into angry sobs and Sirius and Remus wrestled him to the ground.

The next thing they knew a swirl of purple robes that was Albus Dumbledore burst into the room with a grave expression on his panicked face.

"James!" He said rushing to the boy. "James - are you alright?"

Lilly was shaking so badly she had to sit down. "He's drunk professor" she said in a voice as strong as she could manage.

"Shut up Evans!" Sirius said angrily.

"Sirius hold your tongue!" Dumbledore shouted. Lilly made to speak and he said "You too Ms Evans, Shut it."

"James?" he said again to the boy who was sobbing uncontrollably on the floor.

"Get off me!" he yelled angrily as he thrashed about on the floor, fighting off the three people crouching over him.

"Hold him please boys, quickly!" Dumbledore said calmly as he reached into his robes for a small bottle. "I'm sorry James, but this really is necessary. You'll understand in the morning, of course." He said quietly as he forced a mouthful down the boy's throat.

Immediately the boy relaxed and within moments fell into a deep still sleep.

"What did you give him?" Sirius yelled in protest.

"Dreamless sleep potion, Sirius, I'm not likely to poison my own grandson am I?" Dumbledore said forcing a grim smile.

Sirius looked abashed and mumbled an apology.

"Now." Dumbledore said looking up at Sirius and Remus, "Tell me everything. How did he get this way?"

"He went to Hogsmeade under the invisibility cloak and started drinking in the Hogs Head Inn." Sirius said in a defeated voice, realizing anything but the truth was futile right now.

"Yes, I gathered as much." Dumbledore said quietly. "But what I meant was how did he become so enraged?"

"You can thank Evans for that, Sir." Remus said spitefully. "She was yelling at him, and mouthing off about his family, his parents mainly Sir, though I believe you were mentioned once or twice. She called him a..."

"That will do Remus." Dumbledore said quietly. "Through the ignorance and stupidity displayed by Ms Evans here tonight I will take it that we can safely assume she has not heard yet?"

At this Lily made an outraged noise.

"Yes Sir." Sirius and Remus said in unison.

Dumbledore sighed. "Boys, would you mind carrying James up to his bedroom and getting him settled please?"

"Yes Professor"

"Yes Professor"

The two boys picked James up around the shoulders and carried him carefully up the Left staircase. After they had disappeared up into James room Dumbledore turned to Lily, a look of disappointment on his face.

"I would appreciate it if you would be nice to James from now on, Lily. Try to get along with him, at least" He said, rising from the floor and heading to the narrow hallway to leave.

"Sir!" she shouted after him, "What haven't I heard yet? No one will tell me."

Dumbledore sighed. "I'm afraid that's up to James to tell you if he wants you to know. It is not my place, nor would I tell you even if it were. Go to bed Ms Evans, its late. And if I hear anymore about you baiting James like that..."

"He deserved it!" she said flaring up again.

"No, he didn't. So kindly keep your mouth shut. And just so you know, you are forbidden to tell anybody about the events that have taken place here tonight. As far as you are concerned, Ms Evans, they never took place. Am I understood?" he said, losing patience.

"Yes Sir." She said angrily, as he disappeared down the hallway.

Sirius and Remus appeared just in time for her to barge past them as she tore up the stairway to her own room.

Sirius grinned evilly to Remus. "Somebody got told off..."

"Certainly looks that way." said Remus in a slightly more cheerful tone. "I hope James is ok tomorrow."

"We'll just have to keep a closer eye on him from now on." Sirius said thoughtfully.

"And keep that bitch Evans off his back." Remus added as an afterthought.

"Quite." Sirius said as they exited the common room and headed back towards their own dormitory.

"He's holding all his emotions in, that's not a good thing." Remus said in concern.

"Don't worry. We'll talk to him about that tomorrow." Sirius said gravely, then added with a grin, "But hey, if all else fails, we'll just have to tag along the next time he decides to sneak out and get drunk."

Remus grinned. "All for one and one for all. I think I could handle getting drunk for James sake."

"Indeed, my good Mooney, so could I."

* * *

The next morning James awoke to find his grandfather sitting in a chair beside his bed, watching him sleep. He rubbed his eyes blearily and sat up in his bed. 

"What time is it?" he asked wearily.

"Nearly midday." Dumbledore replied kindly.

"What! I've missed half my classes!" James said in panic.

"It's ok James. The teachers aren't expecting you in lessons today."

James looked at Dumbledore in shock. "They know? You told them... them... what happened last night?"

"Not exactly, no. I merely suggested that you needed time to adjust today." He said, his eyes twinkling slightly.

"Oh... I... thank you." He said for lack of better things to say.

"You're most welcome. Oh," he added, pointing to a bottle on the bedside cabinet. "A new batch of dreamless sleep potion. You know, just incase..."

James nodded sheepishly. "Thanks."

"Not at all, James... I think I should apologize... for not coming to stay with you after your parents and sister died. I too, was grieving of course... I was wrong to leave you on your own, I'm very sorry." Dumbledore said quietly, his eyes becoming distant and foggy.

"It's ok." James said automatically, but he knew full well that his grandfather knew otherwise.

Dumbledore smiled kindly. "I will be here, James, whenever you need me. I promise."

"Thanks."

Dumbledore stood up to leave, ruffling James' hair softly as he headed for the door.

"I miss them so much." James blurted out suddenly.

Dumbledore stopped and turned around to look at him in surprise.

"Their voices... their laughter." He continued. "They were in so much pain, grandpa... so much pain..."

Tears slowly began to stain the boy's sheets as his eyes burned furiously. He did not blink them back this time.

The old man walked wearily back to the boy's bed and sat, embracing him in a powerful hug. "I miss them too." He said gently as his own tears began to form. "So, so much. I wish I could take away your memories, James, but they will make you stronger in the end. You have more courage than I have ever had. You get that from your father."

"Will it always hurt this much?" he asked in a choking voice.

"Yes. But you will learn to deal with it over time." He said softly, then adding in a whisper, "Yes... it will take some time..."

* * *

James had no other visitors for the rest of the day until Remus, Peter and Sirius showed up late that afternoon. 

"I've heard some crazy rumors about a projectile vomit effort that could have landed you a world record." Remus said grinning ear to ear.

James laughed sheepishly.

"It was a valiant effort" Sirius pitched in. "But the title will be mine, I assure you."

"Dream on Bone lover." James said smirking, "I, my friend, am undefeatable."

Sirius laughed in bark-like laugh. "Oh-ho! Is that a challenge?"

"You bet it is Padfoot, I value distance over quantity, and you however, have always been the quantity type. There's just no way you can win." James said confidently.

"It's on then." Sirius said in a determined voice. "You will bow before me, Prongs."

James laughed. But his laugh quickly faded as Lily entered his room. She looked at them all in a disapproving sort of way.

"Prongs? Padfoot? You guys are so childish." She said with a snort, and then turning to James she added in a soft voice, "Feeling better?"

Remus and Sirius both snapped their heads around so fast there was a cracking sound. "Why do you care?" they barked in unison.

"Guys." James cut in, "Much better, thanks Evans." James said with a half smile.

"Good." She said stiffly. "Just make sure it doesn't happen again." She added in a softer tone.

Sirius glared at her and James in outrage.

"It won't." he replied, his gaze focused intensely on her.

"Good." she said, turning slightly pink she quickly left the room.

"James!" Yelled Sirius, "What the hell was that? 'Much better, thanks Evans... It won't...' why'd you back down to her like that? She's been a psycho hose beast ever since we got here and you just ..."

"Want to prevent her yelling at me for five seconds." James concluded with a sigh. "Besides, I think she might have got the message last night." he said frowning.

"Yeah Prongs I think you actually scared her." Remus said with a sly grin.

"Maybe she'll shut up now." Sirius said hopefully.

"Let's hope so." Remus said solemnly.

"Hey don't go feeling guilty!" Sirius said stubbornly as he noticed James expression, "If anyone should feel guilty it's her for all that shit she said about you and your family. What you did was sweet and innocent compared to her!"

"Still doesn't make it right." James mumbled incoherently.

Sirius shook his head sadly, looking at Remus in despair. "I think we're losing him."

Remus wiped away a fake tear. "I knew this day would come! Why? Damnit, Why!"

James laughed. "Knock it off guys. I just, didn't mean to scare her so bad is all."

Sirius snickered. "I bet Mooney could scare her even worse tonight, Full moon." He said looking out the window.

"Ooo yes, please James? Let me scare her..."

"No." James said with a laugh.

"Aww." Remus said hanging his head.

"Well don't sulk about it Mooney jeez. I swear you get so wolfish around this time of the month."

"I know I can't help it. Couldn't I just scare her once?"

"No."

"Just a little bit?"

"No!" James said trying not to laugh.

"Damnit, you spoil all my fun." He said in disappointment. "Sirius?"

"I'm afraid I'm with Lupin on this one James, there's nothing I'd love more than to see Lilly Evans crap her pants at the sight of a werewolf in her dormitory." He said snickering.

"So I'm guessing were all heading out to the shrieking shack again tonight?" said James changing the subject. He was eager to spend the whole night with his friends again.

"You better be coming." Mooney said quietly, "I don't want to be cooped up in there all night, I'd quite like to stretch my legs, all four of them if possible."

"Of course we're coming. When have we ever passed up a chance to spend all night on the prowl with you?" Sirius said, as if this was a stupid question. "Right Prongs?"

"Of course, I can't wait." He said with a grin. This was true of course, he loved being in his animagus form, it represented something of freedom to him.

"Good." Remus said sounding relieved. "We'd better get ready to go soon, it's nearing dusk already."

"Good point." James said getting to his feet. "Come on guys, let's get out of here."


End file.
